Day 33

GIIRyudo digs into what looks like a plate of solid, chunky shit from a person with a balanced fiber and roughage intake.

It's like he's TRYING to be the first to die.

"Always SOME motherfucker be iceskatin' up hill and that shit be you motherfucker!"

Yesterday seemingly out of the blue, Duey's guest (tits) had started poking Etcha's guest (Demolition Man).

Looks like he's intent on turning the tables.

Looks like he's intent to escalate this shit, too- he gave her a shove and then this lunging dominant male ape shit.

Personally, because she bears an odd resemblance to Renee Zelleweger, I'm entertaining a personal fantasy here that she's being upbraided for the crimes against and agony suffered by humanity for Bridget Jones' everything.

"Oh yeah? Well fuck YOU, white people CAN and DO LISTEN to Jimmi Hendrix, you fucking mail order blackbelt!"

"Oh why must you say the things that hurt?!"

This went on for about two hours more. Tits chased around Demolition Man, poking and shoving him and making him cry. Then suddenly they both declared, 'oh my it's late goin' home bye bye!' and left.

I'm serious. Both floors are littered with toys. This is how they *choose* to play. They probably identify with the emerald ambience all the toilets in the house emanate.

Oh, fuckin please don't let this go anywhere.

Remember that horrible animal baying away in the beginning of 'An American Werewolf in London'?

They're pretty intent on squeezing as much legislat... er POTTYTRAINING this little despo... I mean cutiepi... oh who the fuck's convinced of any of this.

I am sorry. Since that first GW crack, now I cannot help but think of political tie-in jokes with every moment that NMR plays in other people's urine and stewed loaves.

Mmm...nope. I've got nothing.

Bout fucking time Rathen lifted a hand to do anything other than cry into it like a volunteer for a failed menopause mood swing pill test.

Also please note that that unidentified broken thing that's just bugging me, is still there. I clicked on it, and there's only a 'clean it up' option. So I'm never going to know, and it's some day just going to disappear.

WHAT THE FUCK IS IT

OH MY GOD

DUEY GOT A LOGIC POINT!

Did I have you going? Pra

I wonder if Ob's weighing the needs of humanity's continued freedom against guaranteed damnation and comparisons to Andrea Yates.

Fun Fact! I forgot the name of 'that batshit insane woman who systematically, ritualistically drowned her children' while thinking up that caption. So, I googled for 'crazy bitch drowned children', and her name showed up on the 10th link.

I think Etcha accidentally caught sight of Rathen's withered tuber and taters and it launched him into uncontrollable tears.

I gave Ripley the bitchin' car. She now drives for school instead of getting on the bus and having to put up with the other weepy little motivations for any given Dashboard Confessionals song.

"Don't TOUCH me you fucking queen!"

"Who're YOU calling queen? You're wearing your mother's goddamn engagement ring!"

Then a fire broke out in the kitchen. And nobody cared.

Duey peed like a spooked chihuahua. Stupid fucking leaky, crap-for-pathing old men. There should be a retirement mod that allows you to rig your decrepit, prostate-lax old men with colostomies.

The fireman at least cared.

Then, with nobody to talk to, he left.

SHOCKING. Ob didn't piss himself somewhere randomly.

This room went bonkers. GIIR's talking to Prof. McSoccerball, Etcha cries, and Duey starts shit with Rathen.

This is what a public school education gets you. Ripley learned by observing shop class students that it's far easier sedating and manipulating human chattel through DRUGS, and begins personal research.

DEATH TOILET

Who in the fuck is THIS? I just saw her barge in through the front door and instigate a shoving match with Etcha. Did he shoplift from Hot Topic when I wasn't paying attention?

THAT'S RIGHT

Then, she just walks out. That concluded the most concentratedly absurd, short, moment I've seen yet.

Well, didn't take long for this kitchen to regress.

God. Sweep the sand out already, gosh.

"Ever seen Species? I swear to the fucking blackest star in the sky you son of a bitch if you punch my snowboarder again I will tear your heart out and show it to you like Mola Ram..."

Ok, this just creeped me out, right here. I was panning around, I hit pause for something, and HE WAS STARING INTO MY SOUL

Uh

What the fuck?

Oh sweet purple fuck.

Death by Simtendo Peniis

Welp. If there's ever a warrior's death this forum could appreciate...

Hay Death.

GIIR and Duey shamble in to cry and sigh.

Ripley popped in to check out the commotion, and then just strolls out with a 'been there...' nonchalance.

Fare thee well and is that god damn Duey I see in the background about to piss himself?